As I was singing my little Liam to sleep tonight, a rare occurrence these days as he likes to be laid down after a short snuggle, it hit me...perhaps everything I've been striving for as a mother all along is actually happening after all. I pray every night that I can create a refuge from the storms of life in my home. Something that I admit I feel totally lacking in.
After a stressful morning where I totally blew my stack trying to get little boys to help clean the place up after a crazy week of trying to get all their assignments done and everyone fed and clothed and alive (because of all the fighting and boredom), I thought, "well, today is ruined. I've probably just made things worse for everyone because I couldn't keep it together. Not to mention I just taught them all, again, how to have a temper tantrum. And how to dislike cleaning up even more." I was pretty mad for a while. And they cleaned up a little faster...and then of course they all disappeared into the Florida room as soon as the opportunity presented itself because who wants to be around a crazy lady? I mopped my floor and wasted a lot of time being mad at myself for not teaching them better and for not being more consistent with household chores and for having too much stuff to clean up and for not being able to handle this new phase of life with everyone home with nowhere to go.
It wasn't until I sang the baby to sleep and was thinking about how much I was grateful for this role of mine as mother and how many families might be struggling more than us because they don't have the same teachings and values in their home. And then... I thought about how nice it was to feel the spirit, then it hit me, like lightning, 'my home is a haven from this crazy pandemic storm.' Even with my temper tantrums and craziness. My kids know they are loved. We have food to eat. and by golly I teach them about Jesus Christ! What more could a kid need these days? The songs I sang my sweet baby were about Jesus Christ. He is the answer for everything good in our lives. He's the refuge from the storm.
And my darling little ones, I hope that one day when you read this, you will know that I taught you all I could about the most important things in life. You stay on the covenant path - or get right back on after a temper tantrum like I did- and you keep going.
After a stressful morning where I totally blew my stack trying to get little boys to help clean the place up after a crazy week of trying to get all their assignments done and everyone fed and clothed and alive (because of all the fighting and boredom), I thought, "well, today is ruined. I've probably just made things worse for everyone because I couldn't keep it together. Not to mention I just taught them all, again, how to have a temper tantrum. And how to dislike cleaning up even more." I was pretty mad for a while. And they cleaned up a little faster...and then of course they all disappeared into the Florida room as soon as the opportunity presented itself because who wants to be around a crazy lady? I mopped my floor and wasted a lot of time being mad at myself for not teaching them better and for not being more consistent with household chores and for having too much stuff to clean up and for not being able to handle this new phase of life with everyone home with nowhere to go.
It wasn't until I sang the baby to sleep and was thinking about how much I was grateful for this role of mine as mother and how many families might be struggling more than us because they don't have the same teachings and values in their home. And then... I thought about how nice it was to feel the spirit, then it hit me, like lightning, 'my home is a haven from this crazy pandemic storm.' Even with my temper tantrums and craziness. My kids know they are loved. We have food to eat. and by golly I teach them about Jesus Christ! What more could a kid need these days? The songs I sang my sweet baby were about Jesus Christ. He is the answer for everything good in our lives. He's the refuge from the storm.
And my darling little ones, I hope that one day when you read this, you will know that I taught you all I could about the most important things in life. You stay on the covenant path - or get right back on after a temper tantrum like I did- and you keep going.
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